Angry at God - Part II

I don’t say these things because I’m heartless or without feeling, just the opposite! Yes pain is a part of life and we all have experienced loss and we’re going to get angry at times but we’ve got to get to a point where we completely trust God, even when we don’t understand the reasons why. The sooner we see Him as holy God and a loving Father the sooner we realize that He is our tower of refuge, our healer, and our hero.

We come to God with the understanding that He is the holy, righteous Creator of all life and only through the sacrifice of His Son Jesus Christ are we saved – that’s level one. As we grow in relationship we have more freedom to express ourselves, this is level two. He sees our struggles and our failures, He knows our thoughts and feelings, and we are to work on growing to be more like Jesus in the things we do and say and think but growing is sometimes painful. As we go through trials, if we’re not careful we get this attitude like God owes us something special because of the time we have faithfully served Him but when something doesn’t go our way or we experience the loss of something or someone close to us and we forget the holy, righteous God we knew in level one and instead we begin to scold Him for not protecting us the way we think He should have. The only way to true maturity is that each level builds on the previous one. Yes, we are to be intimate and closer to God than any brother or friend but we can never forget who He is! This idea is not new it is from the Five Levels of Leadership, which is found in John Maxwell’s book Developing The Leader Within You. The levels go in this order position, permission, production, people development, and personhood. You start out following the leader because you have to, then because you want to, next you follow because of what they have done for an organization, next because of what he/she has done for you, finally because of who they are. Learning who God is requires the same level building and though we continue to grow closer to Him we can never forget who He is! Looking at it this way really opens your eyes and makes you think twice about throwing a temper tantrum with God. Yes, hurt and morn the loss but also let God comfort you, don’t push Him away, why would you do that?

As I think about this subject I keep seeing this image of my dogs, who get so excited when I come home from work. After all the jumping (they are both under 30lbs) they immediately go to lying on their backs wanting me to scratch their bellies but it also show submission and trust, if someone they don’t know walks in they go into attack mode! There are some similarities in the relationship between God and me. I love His presence more than anything and I take a posture of submission, knowing He is in control. You see I was in control for a long time and nothing good came of it. If my way was the best then why did I experience so much heartache? No, I long for God’s leading and direction because I trust Him, utterly and completely, with my whole life not just bits and pieces and if that is true how could I possibly ever get mad at the One who gives so much? My very existence depends on His mercy and loving kindness!